Mr. Biden will move the famous former president to an official residence in Downham Market to protect the unruly United Kingdom county.

The US has crucial interests in Norfolk 's military airbase, and Mr. Biden wants Mr. Obama to drive the locals out of the dark ages.

Lorraine Fisher, 34, a political commentator from Washington, said that US bases in East Anglia were vital to the greater military power of the US and were a geopolitical force.

Sadly, although the bases are in an excellent strategic location, they are in Norfolk. The locals are backward and lawless, and there is no better man to win them over and protect our interests than Barack Obama.

Earlier this week, news emerged that Mr Obama was being lined up in London to be an ambassador.

But although some speculated that he will be an ambassador to the EU instead, we can reveal that his appointment to Norfolk is truly an ambassador.

An early problem is finding an official residence in Downham Market, where hovels with straw on the floors are the majority of properties.

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